Giving Thanks

"A lot of things have happened, since the last time we spoke; some of them are funny...some of them ain't not joke; and I trust you will forgive me, if I lay it on the line; I always thought you were a friend of mine..."

Music, as I have previously mentioned, is kind of a big deal to me. I associate a song with each event, each feeling, each disappointment. "My Thanksgiving" has sort of become my guidebook over the past couple years. It reminds me of what is important, what is taken for granted, and what is not given enough appreciation. It whips me back into shape at a time of year in which I tend to find myself overcome with frustration and annoyance. I have quoted this song several times in previous posts because so many lines from it resonate with me, they mean something to me personally, and give me reassurance that I'm headed down the correct path in my life.

"Sometimes I think about you; I wonder how you're doing now; what you're going through"

Sure, in this day and age, it's hard to wonder about much. The answers to most of our questions are literally at our fingertips. Most of our long and forgotten friends can be found on one or more of the many social networks available out there, and I think some people still actually use telephones to communicate. There will always be somebody, however, that you can't seem to locate, no matter how many times you enter their name into a search engine. I have had a few of those on my mind lately...

"The last time I saw you, we were playing with fire; we were loaded with passion, and a burning desire; for every breath, for every day of living, this is my Thanksgiving"

When you play with fire, you'll likely get burned, but sometimes, you can manage to douse the fire and walk away before it gets out of hand. We don't always learn from our mistakes the first time we make them, especially when our heart is involved, but being honest with yourself is the first step in being able to fill the bucket with water.

"Now the trouble with you and me my friend, is the trouble with this nation; too many blessings, too little appreciation; and I know that kind of notion, well it just ain't cool; so send me back to Sunday school; because I'm tired of waiting, for reason to arrive; It's too long we've been living, these unexamined lives..."

"Too many blessings, too little appreciation..." I observe far too many people strut around each day with an undeserved sense of entitlement. I have noticed that respect is severely lacking in our society lately. Perhaps, it bothers me so, because it was the main bullet point my parents stressed to me as I was growing up, which has resulted in my own expectation of it as an adult. It just seems that everywhere I look people are disrespecting something. Be it their country, their loved ones, or their own selves, it's almost as if it has become "in fashion" to treat the things we are supposed to love, as if they are garbage...garbage that owes us something. I may not have a lot by way of monetary possessions, but I am wealthy in the knowledge that I appreciate everything I have, and I respect my parents for instilling that in me at a young age.

"I've got great expectations; I've got family and friends; I've got satisfying work; I've got a back that bends; for every breath, for every day of living, this is my Thanksgiving..."

I do have great expectations, and I fully intend to realize those expectations...I believe I have already started down the path toward doing so. A dreamer is only a fool if they do nothing but dream. My family and friends are not WHO I am, but they are the backbone supporting me to be who I am. I assure you, I never fail to thank God each night for each and every one of them. My job satisfies me, it saved me from the abyss, and because of my job, and the wonderful people I work for and with, I can safely say that my back does bend...some days better than others.

"And have you noticed that an angry man, can only get so far; until he reconciles the way he thinks things ought to be; with the way things are..."

It seems as though, every time I log into my social networking site of choice, I am inundated with people complaining about something, people pissed off about something, or people threatening to kick sombody's ass. Anger is a natural emotion experienced by everybody. However, it is the way one chooses to channel that emotion which declares the kind of person they are and the distance they will travel in this world. These people need to read the above verse and really contemplate the meaning. I am willing to bet it holds true more than most would even deign to admit. That's the tricky part, because you have to admit you're wrong before you can set about making things right. This life is a gift, a privilege. Anyone who fails to recognize that shouldn't be expecting to be handed everything they want.

"Here in this fragmented world, I still believe; in learning how to give love, how to receive it; and I would not be among those who abuse this privilege; sometimes you get the best light from a burning bridge..."

I do my best to not take anything or anybody for granted. I think it is one of my biggest struggles, because, as someone who has been single and has lived alone her entire adult life, I have a propensity toward self-centeredness. I sometimes have to make a conscious effort to show those I love how much I appreciate merely having them in my life. I believe in giving what you get. I also believe that when you give you should never expect something in return, but relish in the satisfaction of doing something for somebody else. However, when you give and give and give, and are only met with disrespect, disappointment and hurt, it is imperative to walk away. I burned a couple bridges this year...and I have to say, the way they lit up the sky was beautiful.

"And I don't mind saying that I still love it all; I wallowed in the springtime; now I'm welcoming the fall; for every moment of joy; every hour of fear; for every winding road, that brought me here; for every breath, for everyday of living, this is my Thanksgiving..."

I am truly thankful for every moment I experience, even the bad ones. I am thankful for the years I was at my lowest, for had I not experienced such dark days, I may never have realized the full magnitude of what it is to be grateful. I am thankful to now be able to put that period of time in perspective, because it now drives me in the opposite direction. I have learned something from each helping hand, from each broken heart, and from each wrong turn. I have learned that focusing on the bad diminishes the good. I have learned that fear can no longer hurt you once it has been conquered. Most of all, I am thankful for tomorrow.

For my readers:

"For everyone who helped me start, and for everything that broke my heart, for every breath, for everyday of living, this is my Thanksgiving."