I have made great strides in my life recently. I have told you all about it many times. Something I still don't have figured out, however, is my love life...the final step. I have family, and friends and a career, but a man to love me (that I also love in return) continues to remain out of reach. I'm not really in that much of a hurry, I enjoy watching whatever I want to watch on TV after a long day at work. I have nearly perfected the one-serving meal, and I really don't want to have to give up time with my own family at Christmas. We've been together for 31 years, I've grown accustomed to our yearly traditions. It won't seem like Christmas if I miss any of it. Aside from all of that, however, something is definitely missing from my life. I feel selfish saying that, I have so much to be grateful for, and I am so incredibly blessed to have everyone and everything I have in my life. What makes me so special that I think I need everything I want. I already have almost everything, isn't that good enough?
I struggle with trying to convince myself I don't need anybody. I can take care of myself, and I do a very good job of it, but isn't it human nature to desire a significant other? To know how it feels to be wanted and loved? I know I am loved by my family and friends, but the love I am talking about is a different kind...at least I assume it is, I don't have anything to compare it to.
I've never really been in love, I don't think. There have been men I know I could have loved if given the chance, but it was never reciprocated. At that point you have to let it go. It's not always easy, but I have to tell myself "If you sincerely care about this person, you have to want them to be happy with or without you". I know all things come in due time, and I am okay with that, but I am 31 years old, I always thought I would have had a family of my own by now. Don't get me wrong, I am willing to wait as long as possible if it means I get to find the perfect person for me, but I haven't even had a practice relationship...unless you count high school, but that was too long ago.
I'm not denying I have some seriously particular criteria. I have had years and years to make it as detailed as possible, but deep down I know I will know when it is right whether or not he ends up meeting these unattainable expectations I have set forth. I have actually been out on a few dates this year. I hadn't been on a date since the summer after high school. I even enjoyed a couple of them.
Truthfully, I am just waiting for the person that I am willing to compromise with. I am very set in my ways, the man who can break my pattern is the man I want to be with. I have a feeling that when I am truly ready to give up my treasured alone time and share a place on my couch every night, and make an extra plate for dinner, and break my Christmas traditions...I'll be ready to settle down. Until then, I am going to take solace in the fact that I can watch old musicals anytime I want, I can sing and dance along to those musicals, and I can have conversations with my dog and cat, without anyone around to judge me.
Friday, May 27, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
This Is Me, Now
As I sat in my office today, with the windows open and the sounds of welding, chirping birds, and Milo barking at the neighbor dog filling the room, I was reminded of the four years I was stuck in the back corner of a windowless building for at least 8 hours a day. "Grateful" is the word that comes to mind now, I am grateful that I get to see the sunshine and feel the rain. I remember a co-worker at the time complaining that a lack of sunlight can affect a person's mood. By then I was already a goner. No, it wasn't the worst job ever, but it was wrong for me, and my sheer unhappiness stole my light while I was there.
My professional life hadn't exactly become what I had hoped it would at that point. I pursued legal assisting because I thought it would be interesting and exciting, and it was, at first, but inevitably my empathy and moral beliefs began to get in the way. I felt like a bad person, like my soul was being sucked out of me day after day. Nobody was happy in that office, and it had worn us all down. Everyday was stressful and negative. The partners were always bitching at each other like little girls. They had all been practicing law for over thirty years, they were nearing retirement and becoming antsy for some free time. Personalities clashed violently. It was a dark and dreary place to work. I struggled to get out of bed in the mornings. I struggled to enjoy anything outside of work under the sickening feeling of knowing I had to return to that place eventually. I looked for jobs, but nothing came along that was right for me. I didn't make enough money, and the yearly raises we were promised were never delivered to any of us. Clearly this was not the thing I was supposed to be doing with my life, but I seemed to be stuck there for whatever reason. I had become unbearable to not only my loved ones, but to myself as well. I felt nothing but hatred for everything. I would look into the mirror and say horrible things to myself, I felt like nothing...less than nothing. I couldn't bear to be around people, especially the people I loved. They didn't know who I was, but how could they? I didn't know who I was. I think the thing that is hardest for me, when looking back, is the fact that I was so caught up in myself and my own dark and twisty negativity, I didn't even recognize when a friend needed me. I felt utterly helpless...and hopeless.
One day, the boss called me into his office. He told me that he was retiring and giving me a month's notice. I cried like a baby. Not because I was going to be out of a job, or because I was sad to be leaving, but because I was finally getting out of there. The relief was overwhelming. I have nothing bad to say about him. He was as good to me as he knew how to be. He is a nice man. He was just too egotistical to notice when someone needed help. (In my opinion, a lawyer has to be somewhat egotistical in order to properly represent his clients. A wimpy pushover isn't going to accomplish much in the ways of negotiating.)
I found a new job within a week. The best part about it was that it was not in a law office. It was in a photo lab. I was excited to learn something new, and even more excited to be working within walking distance of my house. On my last day at the law office, I promised to stop in and visit, knowing full well it would never happen. I spent four years with those people, and with the exception of two of them, I didn't like them all that much, but it's impossible to not miss people that were such a big part of your life. I surprised myself when I cried on my last day, but when I got into my car and pulled out of the parking lot, I felt 1000 pounds lighter. I felt free.
The lab was a better environment, I enjoyed the people and made some good friends, but the economy was bad, and everyone was edgy. Professional photographs are a luxury, and home printing was becoming more popular and more affordable. The mood around the lab wasn't very happy. Inevitably, being the newest person there, I was laid off. I cried that day, but not because I was happy to be leaving. I liked it there, and I cared about the business, I didn't want to see it go under. I began searching for a job immediately. It wasn't long before I had an interview for a temporary job similar to the one in the law office. I sobbed all the way to the interview with the temp agency. I felt I was destined to do this for life. Keep in mind, I was despondent. I lacked reasoning and logic. I wasn't yet aware that the only person who can change my life is me.
While I was unhappy that I didn't get the job I interviewed for, I was also relieved to have some additional time to find something for which I was better suited. I only ended up being out of work a month before the temp agency called me again. The job was like nothing I had ever done before, which intrigued me even more. The best part was that it was temp-to-hire position. I wasn't exactly excited about being a temp. I know some people like variety, but I am not one of them. All I wanted was a stable job that didn't make me want to gouge my eyes out with a letter opener. I didn't want to deal with finding new jobs all the time. It just wasn't for me. After my interview for the temp-to-hire place, I was soaring. I got along really well with the President of the company. The business, at the time, was run out of their house. It was a business that was actually flourishing in a floundering economy. It was something completely new to me. I felt confident.
A week later, I had heard nothing from the temp agency. I ran into an old lawyer friend of mine and reluctantly asked if he knew of any openings. I knew the industry. I had experience in it. I desperately needed a job. I knew I had to put my soul up for sale, once again. However, the very next day, I was offered the job with the temp agency. A few months after that I was hired full time by TSF, and I have now been there for two years. I work in a beautiful place, for wonderful people. I look forward to going to work everyday. I'm driven, and accepting, and...happy.
I have learned so much about myself in the past two years. I have learned that the only limits I have placed upon me are the ones I have placed upon myself. As soon as I realized that, I set to removing those limitations immediately.
My professional life hadn't exactly become what I had hoped it would at that point. I pursued legal assisting because I thought it would be interesting and exciting, and it was, at first, but inevitably my empathy and moral beliefs began to get in the way. I felt like a bad person, like my soul was being sucked out of me day after day. Nobody was happy in that office, and it had worn us all down. Everyday was stressful and negative. The partners were always bitching at each other like little girls. They had all been practicing law for over thirty years, they were nearing retirement and becoming antsy for some free time. Personalities clashed violently. It was a dark and dreary place to work. I struggled to get out of bed in the mornings. I struggled to enjoy anything outside of work under the sickening feeling of knowing I had to return to that place eventually. I looked for jobs, but nothing came along that was right for me. I didn't make enough money, and the yearly raises we were promised were never delivered to any of us. Clearly this was not the thing I was supposed to be doing with my life, but I seemed to be stuck there for whatever reason. I had become unbearable to not only my loved ones, but to myself as well. I felt nothing but hatred for everything. I would look into the mirror and say horrible things to myself, I felt like nothing...less than nothing. I couldn't bear to be around people, especially the people I loved. They didn't know who I was, but how could they? I didn't know who I was. I think the thing that is hardest for me, when looking back, is the fact that I was so caught up in myself and my own dark and twisty negativity, I didn't even recognize when a friend needed me. I felt utterly helpless...and hopeless.
One day, the boss called me into his office. He told me that he was retiring and giving me a month's notice. I cried like a baby. Not because I was going to be out of a job, or because I was sad to be leaving, but because I was finally getting out of there. The relief was overwhelming. I have nothing bad to say about him. He was as good to me as he knew how to be. He is a nice man. He was just too egotistical to notice when someone needed help. (In my opinion, a lawyer has to be somewhat egotistical in order to properly represent his clients. A wimpy pushover isn't going to accomplish much in the ways of negotiating.)
I found a new job within a week. The best part about it was that it was not in a law office. It was in a photo lab. I was excited to learn something new, and even more excited to be working within walking distance of my house. On my last day at the law office, I promised to stop in and visit, knowing full well it would never happen. I spent four years with those people, and with the exception of two of them, I didn't like them all that much, but it's impossible to not miss people that were such a big part of your life. I surprised myself when I cried on my last day, but when I got into my car and pulled out of the parking lot, I felt 1000 pounds lighter. I felt free.
The lab was a better environment, I enjoyed the people and made some good friends, but the economy was bad, and everyone was edgy. Professional photographs are a luxury, and home printing was becoming more popular and more affordable. The mood around the lab wasn't very happy. Inevitably, being the newest person there, I was laid off. I cried that day, but not because I was happy to be leaving. I liked it there, and I cared about the business, I didn't want to see it go under. I began searching for a job immediately. It wasn't long before I had an interview for a temporary job similar to the one in the law office. I sobbed all the way to the interview with the temp agency. I felt I was destined to do this for life. Keep in mind, I was despondent. I lacked reasoning and logic. I wasn't yet aware that the only person who can change my life is me.
While I was unhappy that I didn't get the job I interviewed for, I was also relieved to have some additional time to find something for which I was better suited. I only ended up being out of work a month before the temp agency called me again. The job was like nothing I had ever done before, which intrigued me even more. The best part was that it was temp-to-hire position. I wasn't exactly excited about being a temp. I know some people like variety, but I am not one of them. All I wanted was a stable job that didn't make me want to gouge my eyes out with a letter opener. I didn't want to deal with finding new jobs all the time. It just wasn't for me. After my interview for the temp-to-hire place, I was soaring. I got along really well with the President of the company. The business, at the time, was run out of their house. It was a business that was actually flourishing in a floundering economy. It was something completely new to me. I felt confident.
A week later, I had heard nothing from the temp agency. I ran into an old lawyer friend of mine and reluctantly asked if he knew of any openings. I knew the industry. I had experience in it. I desperately needed a job. I knew I had to put my soul up for sale, once again. However, the very next day, I was offered the job with the temp agency. A few months after that I was hired full time by TSF, and I have now been there for two years. I work in a beautiful place, for wonderful people. I look forward to going to work everyday. I'm driven, and accepting, and...happy.
I have learned so much about myself in the past two years. I have learned that the only limits I have placed upon me are the ones I have placed upon myself. As soon as I realized that, I set to removing those limitations immediately.
Baby Steps
I know I haven't been posting very much lately. I've been consumed with work, and writer's block, and the fact that my brain won't slow down long enough to allow me to string two thoughts together. I have a lot on my mind, and a lot going on, but it seems I always make that excuse when I'm not writing as much as I know I should be. Writing has been my passion for a long as I can remember, because, while I do love my job very much, I didn't dream to be an administrative assistant at a land clearing company when I was a little girl.
I have always written, but only recently have I actually allowed people to read what I have written. I think it was simply fear. Fear that even those that would support me no matter what would secretly think, "Yeah, she's not very good at this". I don't want my dream to be stupid, or viewed as stupid, so I kept it to myself. I was overwhelmed and a little embarrassed by the praise I received after I posted for the first time. I felt like maybe a couple people would read it, roll their eyes, and go on with their day. A million things went through my mind after that first post. I was sick to my stomach about it. I almost hoped people would just ignore it and not read it at all, but the feedback was overwhelmingly positive, and one hell of a confidence-booster. It was not an accident that my first post ("Killing the Spider") was about overcoming fears, and I loved hearing everybody's own stories about killing their own spiders. I even received a few pictures of dead spiders.
I'm going to try to post more often, mainly because it is therapeutic for me. Plus, the more I write, the more comfortable I become with sharing the things I have to say. Right now, it's a blog, but maybe someday it could be a book. I have always been dangerously careless with thinking too far ahead into the future. I find myself becoming easily disappointed when I fail to live up to my own expectations, and I tend to miss out entirely on the here and now. We should all take life one day at a time. I'm not saying to aim lower, I think everyone should aim as high as they can. I am saying to take time to stop and look around. You're not going to get this day back. Small steps do lead to big doorways, even if it seems to take longer to reach them.
I have always written, but only recently have I actually allowed people to read what I have written. I think it was simply fear. Fear that even those that would support me no matter what would secretly think, "Yeah, she's not very good at this". I don't want my dream to be stupid, or viewed as stupid, so I kept it to myself. I was overwhelmed and a little embarrassed by the praise I received after I posted for the first time. I felt like maybe a couple people would read it, roll their eyes, and go on with their day. A million things went through my mind after that first post. I was sick to my stomach about it. I almost hoped people would just ignore it and not read it at all, but the feedback was overwhelmingly positive, and one hell of a confidence-booster. It was not an accident that my first post ("Killing the Spider") was about overcoming fears, and I loved hearing everybody's own stories about killing their own spiders. I even received a few pictures of dead spiders.
I'm going to try to post more often, mainly because it is therapeutic for me. Plus, the more I write, the more comfortable I become with sharing the things I have to say. Right now, it's a blog, but maybe someday it could be a book. I have always been dangerously careless with thinking too far ahead into the future. I find myself becoming easily disappointed when I fail to live up to my own expectations, and I tend to miss out entirely on the here and now. We should all take life one day at a time. I'm not saying to aim lower, I think everyone should aim as high as they can. I am saying to take time to stop and look around. You're not going to get this day back. Small steps do lead to big doorways, even if it seems to take longer to reach them.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Flo-Jo Of The Water
Some people are lucky to have one best friend. I am blessed to have two of them. I'm only going to talk about one of them today, because it happens to be Joanna's 31st birthday. We like to joke we've been friends for 45 years. People have said we have our very own language...they might be onto something.
To be honest, this blog is kind of intimidating. I have to make a choice. Do I keep it short and sweet, leaving some things to the imagination...or do I drone on and on for many paragraphs about the intricate ins and outs of our friendship? I'm still not sure what I'm going to do, I'm just going to write...play it by ear (something Joanna isn't a particular fan of). Ours is a unique friendship, many people do not get us, and many people do not wish to get us.
I met her in 2nd grade, but we became BFF's around 7th or 8th grade. Even then we spoke our own language. That was back when everyone had a landline phone and would call each other's homes and say "Hi, my friend's mom, is my friend there?" in annoyingly childish voices. We were frequently split up during church services for snickering during the song "Under the Weight of the Wood", and it got to the point that we weren't even allowed to sit within hearing distance of one another during Mass. Our sense of humor has matured over the years, but it is no less irreverent or unique...or irritating. Though, I have a feeling even at 31 years of age, we would still embarrass our parents if we sat together during mass. Some things just don't change.
Who remembers the "Newsies" obsession? We watched it no less than three times a day (on VHS). We made up dirty versions to some of the songs, and we forced my little sister, Bailey, to be a newsie for Halloween one year. We actually tried to make her ask people if they wanted to "buy a pape". All we wanted to do was "Seize the Day" and hit the slow-mo button every time the choreography called for the all-male cast (except for Sarah, whose death we actually celebrated in the movie "Alive") to do a hip-thrust.
She has always supported me and loved me for who I am, even if she didn't particularly like who I was at the time. I know I have probably taken her for granted at times, and I know I have failed her in my complete ignorance of a certain situation, but with age comes maturity (hopefully), a time to stop looking at life one-dimensionally. I am grateful for how much stronger our friendship becomes with each year that passes.
She is a wonderful mother to two beautiful, smart, and funny boys. She is a loving a devoted wife to her loving and devoted husband, Fred. She is a loyal friend to her loyal friends. I value her opinion above all others, because I feel she knows me better than anyone in the world. One of my favorite things about her is that she doesn't sugarcoat anything, she just tells it like it is. You have to respect someone like that...and I do. She's like a honey badger, she just doesn't give a shit.
Our reign has spanned decades (in our world, which is a magical world of sense and nonsense). We have been through extreme ups and devastating downs; births and deaths; said tearful goodbyes and ecstatic hellos and this is just the beginning, a fact which baffles me. I can't wait to see what the future has in store, because it all just keeps getting better. The five of us (our "gang", composed of Joanna, Fred, Cris, Sunny and myself) have big plans for retirement that include sitting on porches all day, everyday, drinking...and I don't want to miss that.
Happy Birthday, Jo. You are the Balki to my Larry; the Charlie to my Frank; the Blanche to my Dorothy; the Chandler Bing to my Chandler Bing (because let's face it, neither one of us is Joey). I love you. I am proud to call you my friend.
To be honest, this blog is kind of intimidating. I have to make a choice. Do I keep it short and sweet, leaving some things to the imagination...or do I drone on and on for many paragraphs about the intricate ins and outs of our friendship? I'm still not sure what I'm going to do, I'm just going to write...play it by ear (something Joanna isn't a particular fan of). Ours is a unique friendship, many people do not get us, and many people do not wish to get us.
I met her in 2nd grade, but we became BFF's around 7th or 8th grade. Even then we spoke our own language. That was back when everyone had a landline phone and would call each other's homes and say "Hi, my friend's mom, is my friend there?" in annoyingly childish voices. We were frequently split up during church services for snickering during the song "Under the Weight of the Wood", and it got to the point that we weren't even allowed to sit within hearing distance of one another during Mass. Our sense of humor has matured over the years, but it is no less irreverent or unique...or irritating. Though, I have a feeling even at 31 years of age, we would still embarrass our parents if we sat together during mass. Some things just don't change.
Who remembers the "Newsies" obsession? We watched it no less than three times a day (on VHS). We made up dirty versions to some of the songs, and we forced my little sister, Bailey, to be a newsie for Halloween one year. We actually tried to make her ask people if they wanted to "buy a pape". All we wanted to do was "Seize the Day" and hit the slow-mo button every time the choreography called for the all-male cast (except for Sarah, whose death we actually celebrated in the movie "Alive") to do a hip-thrust.
She has always supported me and loved me for who I am, even if she didn't particularly like who I was at the time. I know I have probably taken her for granted at times, and I know I have failed her in my complete ignorance of a certain situation, but with age comes maturity (hopefully), a time to stop looking at life one-dimensionally. I am grateful for how much stronger our friendship becomes with each year that passes.
She is a wonderful mother to two beautiful, smart, and funny boys. She is a loving a devoted wife to her loving and devoted husband, Fred. She is a loyal friend to her loyal friends. I value her opinion above all others, because I feel she knows me better than anyone in the world. One of my favorite things about her is that she doesn't sugarcoat anything, she just tells it like it is. You have to respect someone like that...and I do. She's like a honey badger, she just doesn't give a shit.
Our reign has spanned decades (in our world, which is a magical world of sense and nonsense). We have been through extreme ups and devastating downs; births and deaths; said tearful goodbyes and ecstatic hellos and this is just the beginning, a fact which baffles me. I can't wait to see what the future has in store, because it all just keeps getting better. The five of us (our "gang", composed of Joanna, Fred, Cris, Sunny and myself) have big plans for retirement that include sitting on porches all day, everyday, drinking...and I don't want to miss that.
Happy Birthday, Jo. You are the Balki to my Larry; the Charlie to my Frank; the Blanche to my Dorothy; the Chandler Bing to my Chandler Bing (because let's face it, neither one of us is Joey). I love you. I am proud to call you my friend.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Marmie's Day
My mother has probably had the most influence over the person I have become. She has always encouraged me to be my own person and go after the things I want. She has never tried to shape me into another Karen Stuffel. She has shown me support and love and guidance to really search within myself to become Lindsey Stuffel. She has allowed me to make and learn from my own mistakes, without being absent from my personal disappointment in myself. She is always there to cheer me on. She is always there to pick up the pieces when I fall apart.
Because of my mom, I can take care of myself. She raised me to be self-sufficient and not rely on others to take care of me. I think sometimes she feels like she was a little too succesful in that area, but I couldn't be more thankful that she was. I can only hope that she is comforted to know that if I ever do find someone to share my life with, it won't be because of desperation or a need to settle for less than I deserve. She has also taught me to appreciate the little things in life. Such as sitting on the front porch while it storms, or lazing around on a Sunday afternoon in the fall watching "Giant" or "Gone With the Wind". I grew up listening to The Beatles, Elton John and Bob Seger. I knew the words to "American Pie" before I knew what they stood for...all because of Karen Lee. When I say "It smells like spring", I think of my mom.
My mother turned 50 this year. She became a grandmother. She has three remarkable daughters. She has a loving and devoted husband. She has two sisters and two brothers. She has more nieces and nephews than one can count. Through all the ups and downs she has experienced in her life she remains loyal and devoted to the ones she loves and grateful for every minute, and her amazing capacity for love is evident when I see my sister with her son.
So, to my marmie, on Mother's Day, thank you, for everything you have given and me, and for everything you have yet to teach me.
Because of my mom, I can take care of myself. She raised me to be self-sufficient and not rely on others to take care of me. I think sometimes she feels like she was a little too succesful in that area, but I couldn't be more thankful that she was. I can only hope that she is comforted to know that if I ever do find someone to share my life with, it won't be because of desperation or a need to settle for less than I deserve. She has also taught me to appreciate the little things in life. Such as sitting on the front porch while it storms, or lazing around on a Sunday afternoon in the fall watching "Giant" or "Gone With the Wind". I grew up listening to The Beatles, Elton John and Bob Seger. I knew the words to "American Pie" before I knew what they stood for...all because of Karen Lee. When I say "It smells like spring", I think of my mom.
My mother turned 50 this year. She became a grandmother. She has three remarkable daughters. She has a loving and devoted husband. She has two sisters and two brothers. She has more nieces and nephews than one can count. Through all the ups and downs she has experienced in her life she remains loyal and devoted to the ones she loves and grateful for every minute, and her amazing capacity for love is evident when I see my sister with her son.
So, to my marmie, on Mother's Day, thank you, for everything you have given and me, and for everything you have yet to teach me.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
P.S. Unite
I know I'm not the only one who is sick of the rain. The sound of a spring rain, a sound that used to make me feel calm and relaxed, has now become a sound that makes me anxious and stressed out. My basement has been continuously wet for the past three weeks. My house smells bad. My cat tracks wet kitty pawprints over my kitchen floor, usually right after I have finished mopping up the previous set. If I didn't know better, I would think she does it on purpose. I don't know about the rest of you, but I am looking forward to my summer routine more than ever before.
Cookouts with my friends. Floating with my ladies. Being outdoors in general. I love the smells of summer, the feel of summer, the taste of summer. I love the feeling of not caring how my arms look in a tank top, because it is so hot I can't bear to wear anything else. I love the first charred, completely dried out hamburger of the year, the hamburger that comes before the grill master has fully achieved his (or her) grilling mojo for the summer. I ache for the smell of chlorine and sunscreen, and the completely exhausted feeling I get when I return home from the pool; feeling a little buzzed, and my cheeks looking a little pink.
Summer is still like a vacation for me, even though I work more than I do in the winter. I love summer at work. My office has windows that open. People are buying lots and lots of mulch. Snow days are far far away. Life is grand.
I have high expectations for this summer. I long to spend my weekend days with my lovely pool ladies. I long to spend my weekend nights with my lovely friends cooking out and laughing. I long to watch my nephew continue to grow. I am sure there are many surprises in store for me in the next few months. I know I will make many more memories to last a lifetime. The rain has to end sometime, doesn't it?
Cookouts with my friends. Floating with my ladies. Being outdoors in general. I love the smells of summer, the feel of summer, the taste of summer. I love the feeling of not caring how my arms look in a tank top, because it is so hot I can't bear to wear anything else. I love the first charred, completely dried out hamburger of the year, the hamburger that comes before the grill master has fully achieved his (or her) grilling mojo for the summer. I ache for the smell of chlorine and sunscreen, and the completely exhausted feeling I get when I return home from the pool; feeling a little buzzed, and my cheeks looking a little pink.
Summer is still like a vacation for me, even though I work more than I do in the winter. I love summer at work. My office has windows that open. People are buying lots and lots of mulch. Snow days are far far away. Life is grand.
I have high expectations for this summer. I long to spend my weekend days with my lovely pool ladies. I long to spend my weekend nights with my lovely friends cooking out and laughing. I long to watch my nephew continue to grow. I am sure there are many surprises in store for me in the next few months. I know I will make many more memories to last a lifetime. The rain has to end sometime, doesn't it?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)